One day I was moving 30 gallons of water. Because I can't complete any task without nabbing a few self-inflicted injuries, I caught my ankle under the cart. I went to the ER and the 7 people who helped me were just lovely. I did everything they said.
Three weeks later, my foot was giving me a bit of trouble. I had been completely ignoring it and traversing Chicago daily, going to shows, and running to catch trains, so I could understand why it was testy. I guilted the foot doctor receptionist into squeezing me into the Friday schedule.
The foot doctor was a horrible human being. I didn't trust him. So I am disinclined to believe that I am as perambulatorily fucked as he says. But now I find myself signed up for physical therapy, lying on the couch and watching my life wither away as "Little Women"'s melodrama infects my brain. As I close my eyes during the umpteenth moment of soaring soundtrack horn solos, Winona Ryder narrating with doelike tears filling her eyes, I remember the ER doctor chuckling and saying "Achilles tendonitis is the WORST that could happen... but it won't. It won't!"
There's nothing more eloquent than a sad-faced emoticon.
:(
I'll leave you with a little domestic abuse-tinged Grizzly Bear to round out the sufferin' mood.
Grizzly Bear - He Hit Me (And It Felt Like A Kiss)
Um. Also, I just found the best blog post in the world about little women:
"LITTLE WOMEN
Why does Jo get angry very often?
I think Jo get angry is because Amy burnld her book. Jo very like her book. But Amy burndle her book so Jo get angry."
Indeed.
1 comment:
Your writing's okay, but you're no Faulkner.
...bullshit! This is actually hilarious. Why the fuck did you watch that movie? Were you incapacitated to the point where you were forced to watch horribly depressing movies as you languished on the couch?
If I had ever read any Faulkner, I'm sure that I would quickly come to the conclusion that your work is a much more enjoyable read.
You should write more. Especially seeing as you're not going many places anytime soon. Heal that foot so's we can go shoppin'.
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